Avoid the "Danny & Pepper Jerk Express"

You'll understand the title when you reach #8 below. This entry is dedicated as the Top 10 Reasons You Know You're A True Foodie. Not a gourmet foodie, but just an unhealthy obsession with food, talking about food, reading and writing about it.

1) I read "Fast Food Nation" and yet I've been spotted with a McDonald's burger since that book.

2) I read "The Man Who Ate Everything" and thought "he could've eaten more - he didn't really eat EHHHHVERYTHING".

3) I watched "Supersize Me". Ditto to #2 about still having McD's every so often. I have even driven to the one drive-through McDonald's in Manhattan. Bet YOU don't know where it is.

4) I signed up on Zagat's to be a reviewer for them. Seriously. You submit a few reviews, even if/when they don't get published, and you get a free copy of the book. EVERY YEAR. I have the silliest Zagat's (Movies, Broadway shows, nightlife, etc)

5) One of my bookmarks: Eater - a site purely about NYC restaurants openings, closings, buzz, etc.

6) Chowhound - site for NY foodies to recommend what's good in what neighborhood, etc.

7) GOLDEN APPLE AWARD: These are given out by the NY Dept of Health Inspections. The NY Restaurant Inspection Lists are here - you can sort by zip code or by violation points too see what's REALLY gross.

8) My version is the GOLDEN SHITBOX AWARD: Follow-up to #7. I wasted time and wanted to see what restaurant in NYC got the worst rating based on violations. Danny and Pepper earned 193. You are in some serious shit if you get a 35 or worse. Don't worry, the DOHI closed 'em down.

9) I save my "fat" pants just in case I get REAAAAAALLLLY into food again.

10) Though a slightly "almost racist" statement (screw it - it's my blog) - what Jew do you know that doesn't love food? I can tell you which ones. The ones that LIE. Every gathering we have revolves around food. Hell - we have a freakin' HOLIDAY that centralizes around what certain foods symbolize all piled on one plate. AND - our holiday that asks us to be forgiven for our wrong-doings? We repent by NOT EATING.