There have been an influx of articles in the past year about 'metrosexuals' - men who enjoy pampering themselves, are into their looks, clothes, and in my mind - are essentially taking care of themselves the way many gay men do without actually being gay. However, I've discovered a mutation of this - the kind of man that isn't a metrosexual. He scoffs at dressing trendy and still dresses laid-back, watches sports every weekend, burps, and is a 'man-man'. I took this kind of man to a spa yesterday for a massage; a good friend of mine who also happens to be a sportswriter for a living, and realized how few spas cater towards this type of man.
We went to a 'budget' spa (if it can be called that for a $78 hour massage) that felt very sterile. The walls were thin enough that he could hear me laughing in the next room when Zamfir's version of "Proud to Be An American" was playing. There were no men's and women's changing rooms - only one room with 20 lockers and shower curtains between a wall for us to change in. Seeing him come out in a robe and the same slippers I was wearing was worth the trip. I think I could make a lot of money having a spa that truly catered to men and women: instead of frilly white robes, tea and Cosmo Magazine, there would be Coors Light, the latest Sports Illustrated and grey, dense robes would be available for the guys.
I hope men around the world read this blog, unite, and say 'enough you sissy metrosexuals - we deserve our own kind of pampering, god dammit.' However, I hope this falls short of the "happy ending" that all too many men secretly wish for with their 'massage'.
At least it was a damn good massage.
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